Yes, today was the day we found out what whether Toby would have a little brother or sister. But before I get into that I want to tell you about the interesting morning I had. You know how in my last post I said I've been feeling like I am having another boy? Well when I checked my email this morning, I was caught off guard by an email from a business which was called one of the girl names Nick and I like (we're still not 100% sold on it so I'm not going to reveal it just yet). Interesting coincidence though right? Then as we were driving to our appointment, I saw a sign on the side of the road with the same girl name on it. And lets just say it's not a real common name, so that really threw me off. At this point a trickle of doubt crept into my mind about my maternal instincts and I wondered if deep down I just wanted a boy because that is most familiar and comfortable to me.
Now for the actual appointment. The doc said everything - all the organs, the measurements, etc. - looked perfect and normal. He actually described the heart as "beautiful." And just knowing the baby is healthy and thriving, is wonderful news by itself.
When he got to the sex of the baby, he immediately said "girl." But then after a few seconds back-peddled and mused, "Well, I'm pretty sure it's a girl. The legs are very close together which is making me wonder a bit." It's making me wonder a bit too, I thought anxiously. When he looked from a different angle he noticed the umbilical cord in between the legs which continued his guessing game. But then he went back to the original between-the-legs view and kept reiterating that he was "pretty sure" it was a girl. When I looked over at Nick, he was beaming and immediately said, "I knew it. I knew all along" (he has wanted a girl so bad). I just sat there speechless. Before the appointment, I was honestly indifferent about the sex of the baby. Just happy for whatever and excited to finally know one way or another. Now the doctor was just teasing me with all this "pretty sure it's a girl" talk. I suddenly wanted a 100%, hands down, no question it is a girl (or boy) answer. The doc then told me to remind them at my next visit to do a quick check ultrasound just to be certain of the sex. Oh I'll remind them alright. I left the office feeling a bit deflated and irritated.
As we drove home I vented my frustration: "That was a bit anti-climatic don't you think? Now I really don't know what to think. Are we really any more informed than before the appointment?" Nick was patient and reminded me that we now know that we have a healthy baby, and that is what's most important. True. Very true. But I was still a bit unsettled. Especially with being 21 weeks along, I thought the doc should be able to say "for sure" whether it's a boy or girl. But what can you do if the little one wants be "shy" (that is how the doctor put it)?
When we got back home, Nick and I studied the ultrasound picture some more. We talked about my experience this morning with the email and seeing the sign with one of the girl names we liked. Nick just kept saying "It's a girl, Deb. I just know it." For the first time, I let myself get excited and smiled at the thought of holding a little baby girl in my arms.
So the general vibe in our home is "girl." And I really hope we are right because I seriously can't get that girl name out of my head now. :)