A rollercoaster day

Today I had my 13 week appointment. Don't worry, my baby is A-OK. My doc found the heartbeat right away and stated that everything seemed to be fine with the little bean (now the size of a shrimp but that makes me sick thinking about a shrimp swimming around inside of me, so I still prefer to say bean).

Me, on the other hand, not so good. After testing my urine sample, he said I was severely dehydrated and that he was concerned about my weight loss: I have lost 16 lbs. since the beginning of my pregnancy. I was shocked! I knew I had lost a little weight but when I heard that I was completely freaked out. He asked me if Zofran was helping - I said yes and no. "Yes" in that it is keeping me from barfing 6-8 times a day. "No" in the sense that I still throw up about every other day and still not much of an appetite. I can eat a small breakfast, a couple bites for lunch, and pretty much no dinner (which is actually an improvement from a few weeks ago). My doc was really concerned and said that I needed to go over to the hospital right away to get set-up on some IV's. He also said that I needed to be in better touch with them about how I was feeling and make sure I am staying hydrated. He then added Pepcid AC to my Zofran and Fenegren (sp?) meds to see if that would help with all the acid in my tummy that is keeping me from eating. During the whole doctor visit, I kept my composure and even managed to fake a smile as I said goodbye to the nurse. But as soon as I got in my car, I burst into tears. I felt like such a failure of a mom and the little one hasn't even been born yet. The thing is, I really have tried hard to force myself to eat, even when I was had to gag the food down. And I've kept my fridge well stocked with Gatorades, Sprite, Ginger-ale...you name it, I've guzzled it. The only red flag I've seen was that the past few days I have definitely felt more dizzy, tired, and had quite a few headaches. But I chalked it all up to me being prego, not dehydrated. So while I was wiping the tears from my eyes, as well as avoiding looks from other drivers, I desperately tried to get a hold of Nick. No luck. I remembered when I left the house he was mowing the lawn with Toby and was probably weed-wacking as I called him and texted him in vain. While I waited for him to call back, I called my dad and luckily he happened to be in the area working at the Saratoga Springs clinic (he is a Physician Assistant) and said that he would come to the hospital with me. I immediately felt relieved that I would have someone there to keep me company and keep me from tearing myself apart. Just as I pulled into the hospital, Nick called. He assured me that everything was going to be OK, not to worry, the baby is fine...all the stuff I needed to hear. I also was able to talk to my my mom who reminded me about my friend, Deborah, who was on IV's through most of her pregnancy and still was able to have a full-term baby with no complications. After my IV, I felt A LOT better. I even felt pretty darn silly for my earlier break down. Crazy pregnancy hormones I guess.

And I am sure you guys are really tired of all my posts about me being sick and miserable (as am I) so I promise to have some more upbeat entries that have absolutely nothing to do with my bodily fluids (or lack of). Thanks for your comments, texts, phone calls, supportive smiles and kind words. It has truly helped me survive the past few months, more than you know. :)